...Barely tolerable, I daresay...

How on earth do you get someone to realize that they're being oblivious to the world around them?  That their expectations are too high or are completely unrealistic?  My sister thinks she can live with me the rest of her life or until her Sect 8 comes through.  I doubt it's ever going to come through and I doubt my ability to get her to see that staying here isn't in anyone's best interest.  Especially not mine.

When I told her (again!) a few days ago that she needed to leave and find a place of her own, she looked like I was speaking an otherworldly language.  I told her that she's causing problems in my marriage and my home life.  Her question was, "how am I a problem to your marriage?"  Do I have to spell it out graphically?  Sure, she's finally taken the hints that she stay in her room instead of wandering around us all the time.  But, her presence in the house remains. 

I see two options for her in the immediate future.  1.  She rents a room at someone Else's house.  2.  She moves into a care home facility.  She violently opposes moving into someone else's home because they're "strangers".  And?   I can't help that.  I haven't raised the care home option yet as I'm sure she'll come unhinged.  The care home would have someone there 24 hrs to monitor meds and appts and meals and such.  Everything is included and the fees would be covered by her SSI.  She's talked about moving in with an internet friend in another state.  I wonder if the friend knows about this?  Just curious.  I don't see that as a viable option, so it's not in my options list.

The only way I see my sister moving out is if we give her a date that she MUST move out by.  No if's ands or buts.  My home and family are more important than her desire to have things as she wants them.

I've signed up for a class given by NAMI (Nat'l Alliance on Mental Illness) to teach me to deal better with having a mentally ill family member.  Being that I'm her sister and care giver, I guess I doubly qualify.  I'll miss a couple of classes due to my cruise, but who cares?  Between my therapy sessions and the classes, maybe I'll get a better idea how to make things better for myself instead of doing everything for her.

On a far more positive note, I've lost about 18 lbs.  I'm not sure what the ratio of fat to muscle is since I didn't get measured when I started and the trainer blew off the appt I made last week to get measured.  I've gone from a 16 to a 14 with the latter becoming a bit loose.  The underarm flab is still there, but there's less of it and it doesn't jiggle for quite a long as before.  I hope to have lost more size by the time of the cruise, but if I don't, that's ok, too.  At least I have more clothes to wear now I'm back to a 14. 

I've been going to the gym 5 days a week.  Mon, Wed and Fri, I do about 30 min of cardio followed by weight machines for arms, chest, upper back and legs.  On Tue and Thurs, I do 60 min of cardio and weight machines for abs, low back and obliques.  I'm back to where I was in July of last year.  Damn the depression that kept me away from the gym from winter last year until this summer!

Hubby is having his 2nd sleep study tonight.  Last time they decided he was definitely a candidate for the cpap machine, so tonight's the night that the strap it on his face and see if his sleep is improved.  He told me last week that he hasn't felt like he's dreamed in months.  Not even that he's dreaming and can't remember the dream.  He doesn't dream at all.  No REM sleep?  I hope the machine helps him.  I think it would be damned difficult to sleep with.